I’ve recently finished reading Richard O’Connor’s book Happy at Last: The Thinking Person’s Guide to Finding Joy. O’Connor doesn’t identify himself as part of the Positive Psychology movement, and in fact has some criticisms of it, but I am putting this review in my Positive Psychology series because it is definitely in the same general zone: learning how to be happy.
The author’s previous books include Undoing Depression and Undoing Perpetual Stress, and he is a psychotherapist who works with depressed people and who himself has struggled with depression. Good credentials. Although he doesn’t go into scientific studies in depth in the body of the book, preferring the more layperson-friendly approach of endnotes without explicit markers in the text, he does base what he says on current science. This isn’t just a survey of knowledge, though; it’s a practical guide, with techniques and exercises.
O’Connor, like me, thinks very highly of the potential of meditation (specifically, in his case, mindfulness meditation) to help us improve our lives. It’s the main technique he recommends, in fact. He also puts forward a strong critique of contemporary culture and its consumerism, and makes it very clear that money does not buy happiness. But he’s not just a hippy. He emphasizes taking pleasure in what we have, dealing appropriately with grief and pain when they come to us, and looking for meaning in our lives. He discusses how the brain’s innate mechanisms are set up to produce desire, not happiness, and how we can work around this; talks about defense mechanisms and their uses and dangers; and knowledgeably expounds on the inner critic, stress, how to improve your personal relationships, and the importance of daily gratitude. (He recommends reminding yourself each night of three things you are grateful for about the day. It’s a good exercise.)
There’s a mass of good stuff in here. I don’t agree with everything he says, of course; for one thing, he’s a psychotherapist and so tends to believe that change takes a long time and a lot of self-exploration. Time and self-exploration are important, but people who are ready to change can do so surprisingly quickly and without an archaeological expedition, in my experience. Minor quibbles aside, though, this is an excellent resource and I recommend it to anyone who would like to increase their overall level of happiness in life.
Technorati Tags: happiness, positive psychology, book review, meditation, technique, gratitude, psychology, joy
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