Every now and again it pays to think about what you’re doing.
The end of the year is approaching, and I have a lot of new subscribers to my mailing list (which includes these blog posts). In case you feel like you came in partway through the play – and also because I’m planning to do things differently next year – today’s post is largely about “what this blog is about”. (I will give you something to do, though, because I’m like that.)
When I named my blog, about three years ago now, I wanted a name that reflected my emphasis on living life purposefully and taking charge of our own lives. “Living Skillfully” was what I came up with.
It’s originally a Buddhist phrase. I’m not a Buddhist, but I have a lot of respect for what Buddhism contributes to the techniques of personal development.
At the end of September, I changed the second part of the name from “Your Mind and Health” to “Change Your Life”. My emphasis has been shifting, from “health through mental skill” to “personal development” – but health is a personal development issue (as I’ll be saying repeatedly).
My last two projects, the free Simple Stress Management course and the Stop Procrastinating, Start Succeeding course, were about getting junk out of the way so that you can move and grow. (I’ve reflected this theme in an update to the look of the blog, by the way – I just had a coaching call with Mars Dorian, and he pointed out that it was looking cluttered.)
My next two planned projects are a stop-smoking course and a membership site to help people enjoy improving the state of their bodies, and I will be talking, as I’ve always talked, about improving your physical health without substances or devices, by mental techniques and behaviour change alone. But that’s the how. It’s the what and the why that are more important.
To explain further what I’m on about, I’ll give my answers to some questions that Naomi Dunford of IttyBiz came up with a little while ago. Naomi’s stuff isn’t to everyone’s taste (you need a high tolerance for swearing, for a start), but she comes up with some gems sometimes.
What’s your game? What do you do?
I help people who want to change their lives for the better and live more gloriously.
I connect them with resources (including their internal resources), and show them simple techniques that can give them a sense of progress and control.
I help them evaporate the ghosts of past painful experiences that are standing in the way of living a larger life.
I offer them the kind of appropriate challenges that help to build capacity to deal with life.
And I remind them that what you pay attention to changes your experience of life, and you get to choose what you pay attention to.
This isn’t “The Secret”, or even a secret. I can point to science (real science) to back it up, and it’s all based on techniques that are widely known (but not widely enough). Living Skillfully is all about deliberately shifting your attention to get better outcomes in life – choosing the life you live instead of just letting life live you.
Why do you do it? Do you love it, or do you just have one of those creepy knacks?
Both, of course. I love to see people open up and connect to greater possibilities. It’s the best thing in the world. But I also seem to be quite good at it.
I can’t tell you how often I’ve seen the cycle where someone comes to me thinking, “I’m not sure if this will work”. They go away after the first session: “I’m not sure that worked.” Then in their daily life, they start to notice that they’re thinking and feeling and acting differently, quite naturally and effortlessly, and they say, “Hey, how does that work?”
Who are your customers? What kind of people would need or want what you offer?
Ordinary, busy people with real lives, jobs, perhaps families, responsibilities and the constraints that come from having all those things – but who still want to be more than they are.
People looking for a way, in the midst of their lives, to fulfill a little of their dreams.
People who are willing to work on changing because they can see the value they’ll get.
People who are tired of being passengers in their lives, and who want to steer.
People who want something they can do to improve their lives while they mow the lawn.
What’s your marketing USP? Why should I buy from you instead of the other losers?
(That’s Naomi’s phrasing, of course.)
I break down really effective techniques so that they’re easy to understand and put into action. (I don’t just offer vague encouragement and motivational quotes to make you feel comfortable because you’re thinking about personal development. I give you methods that work to actually do personal development.)
I’m grounded in science but focussed on practicalities, not theory.
I use what I teach and it works for me. (I’ll talk about that more in future.)
And I cut to the chase.
What’s next for you? What’s the big plan?
I want to scale up so that I’m working with enough people to achieve something really remarkable.
I want to put people back in touch with their bodies so that they’re actually living life instead of being lost in a trance.
And I want to put them in touch with their dreams and help them to live out their best values.
So, next year you’re going to hear a lot about bodies and minds – but from a personal development viewpoint, not a medical viewpoint that’s all “this wetmachine should work better, give it a pill”.
I’ll still be listening to you as you tell me what you’re interested in, of course (see below). But living a better life embodied is going to be my main emphasis.
Oh, and while I think about it, I’m planning to start a podcast in the New Year, as well. At the moment it’s called “Personal Development Views, Reviews and Interviews”.
Action Now
So here’s the thing for you to do that I promised at the start of the post. It’s all very well for me to have plans, but I want to make sure that I’m listening to you and giving you what you want and need to live a fuller life.
Is there anything else you want to know? Anything that particularly strikes you out of all of that? If you could change your life to be more like your ideal, what would that look like and what would you need in order to get there?
Tell me in the comments.
